In our house, it’s 2 boys, 2 parents and we lead one life (oh, we must not forget Ms. Nike our beloved pup). Yes, they also have a life with their mom at her house, but we lead one pretty cool life in our house. I wouldn’t say that I’m a professional parent and I always have learning to do, but I feel pretty good about the strides that I’ve come in the last 5 years! Yes, I’ve officially been in the boys’ life for over 5 years now! The time has gone so fast! Every day I’m amazed at how fast they are growing and maturing.
This past weeked M decided to spend the weekend at my mom & step-dads. (You can find out why he loves it over there from THIS post.) So, for the majority of the weekend, it was just T, R, & I. As my mom was picking M up I said to her that I enjoy the weekends that M is gone and we get time with R just as much as the time we have M at our house alone (this typically happens more)! I love getting to have individual time with each boy. That leads me to my few tips about parenting multiple kids.
Remember, each kid is different! M is our motor head! He loves anything to do with cars, trucks, dirt bikes, go-karts. You name it, if it
has a motor and tires, he love
s it. He loves being dirty and is always on the go! He loves playing games as a family and quite honest…anything “as a family”. R is very quiet, enjoys sports, and trying new things. He is much more reserved and doesn’t talk a lot, especially if M is around! He is more thoughtful than M and is very deliberate in everything he does. When we plan vacations and activities, we have to keep both boys in mind because they like very different things. Remember that each kid is different and that is ok and honestly, encouraged. Being different lets them establish their own identities as they grow older.
Each kid needs attention! It can be difficult to spend time with the kids (especially as they get older and more involved in activities), but it is so important to give them individual time. Having 2 boys can provide it’s challenges, but one thing I’ve learned that because each boy is different (see point #1) it is important to give them individualized time based on their likes. R loves to play one on one basketball with either T or I. M loves to ride 4-wheelers with either of us. On our last family vacation M & I went horse back riding while T & R went to the driving range. R & I are going to visit my FIL while T & M go bowling and out for wings. R loves going for BBQ while M prefers BWW. Give each kid time with individual parents and the parents together. It is important for them to know that they are your
Make your spouse a priority! Sometimes when there are kids involved in a relationship (multiple or not) it’s easy to get swept up in them and their needs and their activities, but…you must make their parent (your spouse) a priority. Show your kids how much your spouse means to you. I believe that as parents if we make sure to focus on each other, we become better parents for our kids, we provide a more united front (in the good & and the bad times)! I think it is also our job to show our kids what good healthy families and marriages are! In order to have that to show our kids, we must have a healthy marriage and in order to get that we must make them a priority! Plan time with yur spouse, without your kids! You children will see parents who are in love and more enjoyable to be around!
Raising kids isn’t easy! Parenting is one of the toughest, yet most rewarding jobs on the planet! I feel priviledged every day to be in these boys’ lives and helping to raise them. I have to remember my own rules some days to strive to be the best parent that I can. I fall sometimes and pick myself up and am constantly Learning As I Go!